Ms Wimpy

So I spent the evening hiding in my monster sofa, eating Nutella, untill Mr Husband came home. I was a lot more vulnerable and wimpy after yesterdays experience than I would initially admit – or that I would have thought I would be. The first hour I just thought ‘Nothing happened. You did well, you listened to your gut and nothing happened.’ I was all fired up and action, adrenaline running. Then I made tea and curled up.

One memory kept coming back to me over and over. I could not stop thinking of my grandmother, who was robbed in a similar way, though much worse. This was back home in Denmark, in Copenhagen, it was Easter 1994. She lived in an apartment block, where you could not see her front door from the street, because of bushes and trees. That day someone was hiding between the trees and jumped at her, when she opened the door. He put a knife to her throat and forced her up the stairs to her apartment.

It is a terrible story. It shook all of us at the time. The robber first tied her in her living room, while he searched the house, then tied her in the bedroom and put a piece of furniture in front of the door, to stop her getting out. He then cut the phone cord before leaving. It was a terrible ordeal. He took all her jewelry; he even took her wedding ring off her finger. It was very, very bad.

So while drinking my tea, my imagination ran wild. I kept thinking what could have happened and what did happen to grandma. And I kept thinking why would someone do this? It is so up and personal. So very different from ‘just’ breaking into a house with no people in it. Why the personal attack? But people get robbed every day and, in most cases, the robbers get away with it. It is hard to catch them. They never caught grandma’s robber.

I’m sorry for writing all this blabber. I am hoping I will be less wimpy if I write about it. I’m thinking ‘get it out there, leave it out there.’ It worked with my Angry Bird post from yesterday, though that was short-lived. I’m beginning to discover how powerful a tool this writing business is. On a personal level. So now I’ve wallowed so much in this story that I don’t want to be wimpy anymore! End of that. Thank you for listening.
I mean that. Thank you.

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3 thoughts on “Ms Wimpy

    • It is funny with this blog. It is still fairly new for me as it is for you. Still trying to find my way in here. I have decided to be honest and show the more vulnerable side of myself in here and most of the people around me are stunned. I normally never stop smiling. By nature I’m a very positive person, it takes very little to make me happy. And it normally takes a lot to get me down. In writing I sometimes seem so angry and negative (I am angry sometimes, but rarely overwhelmed by it). It is weird how words change without the facial expression.

      One thing I have been laughing about, was the ‘music in the ear’ comment. Normally it is me who rant about how people will do everything to avoid experiencing reality. To the point of where they put on sunglasses, music in their ear and chew gum. All senses dulled! No birds singing. But sometimes that is also me 😉
      I’m sorry I haven’t commented on your blog yet. I have so many thoughts about what you write, but am not able to write anything meaningful about it yet. I am fascinated by those letters. They are so beautiful, a story in their own right. I will keep following your story, that is for sure. Best wishes from here 🙂

      • Thank you. It was great to get your note, and to learn more about you. It seems we might be a little alike. My mother used to accuse me of being a Pollyanna – always happy, always optimistic, hopeful. Not so – the injustices of the world have always worked me up, and the frailty and tenuousness of life (all life) makes me fearful for us all … What I’m finding with the Blog is that it’s a pretty safe space to express the emotions of the moment – a thought arises and the post (or the comment box) is the place to think about it some more – quite cathartic, I suppose, but in grabbing hold of the thought and examining it, we stop long enough to experience things more consciously and that’s what I like, because, as you say, so much of our lives seem to be devoted to camouflaging our feelings, ourselves, distracting ourselves, entertaining ourselves, instead of just being ourselves. I love – love – music. But I’ve been turning it off as a background to my life, instead choosing to be more open to the sounds around me, and then, when I choose to listen to music, to listen to the music. I’ve been enjoying both a lot more. (If I had to lose one of my senses, the worst would be hearing.)
        And best wishes from here …

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